Communication is key

In war the first thing that the enemy does is try to cut off the other sides communication, with out communication they are easier to trap and overthrow. Because communication is the key. It is the key in war, it is the key at work, and it is the key in the family.
Because communication is so vital in a family it is blamed a lot. It can be blamed for how someone feels or for how a person acts. Now communication is important to have and it really does make family life easier, we need to realize that their is a fine line between communication going south, and our own negative thinking. Each situation that we are put in gives us a chance to communicate what is happening but it also gives us the chance to think about the situation and interpret it the way that we see it. For example if you have had a bad day or things just don't go as planned, you get upset at your significant other., so to entertain your negative feelings by thinking about all the things that they did wrong, you begin to think that they are the wort thing ever and you really don't like them. How does that affect the way you treat that person? You begin to act differently around them. Well lets think about changing that negative thinking into something positive, like saying, wow my husband went to work for us today so that we can save up money, he cares about us that much, or say he cleared his plate after dinner and helped the kids wash dishes, I'm so grateful he did that for me, you begin to find more things to be grateful about. How do you think that will help you see that person? You begin to associate them with positive things. I think that changing our thinking can benefit many parts of our lives. Improving our attitudes can be an amazing thing! Each day can get better and better. Now it doesn't mean that we are going to be 100% happy all of the time, it will only help when we get in bad situations to have a way to cope and build ourselves and others up instead of tearing them down. Cognitive thinking can be the most beautiful thing but also the ugliest. Remembering to stop and relax then think things through could stop a lot of the heart ache in the world.
Back to communication, where does communication get lost? I believe that communication gets lost when you interpret what someone says, and you interpret it your way but they don't mean it that way. When communication there are three important things that happen, out thoughts and feelings, encoding, and a medium. Our thoughts and feelings are taking what is being said and putting emotions behind it which naturally happens. The encoding is the interpreting part of communication we take what is being said and personalize it to us, but a warning with encoding, it has not value unless it can be decoded. So try to be clear and concise with your codes, use complete thoughts. The Mediums or medias consist of three things words, tone, and then nonverbal. 14% is words and what is actually being said, then 35% is the tone, i dont know about you guys but my mom always said its not what you said its how you said it. The last percentage is 51% is nonverbal.
With all of this being said i hope that we will be able to listen to others and be more open to communication and positive thinking as we train ourselves to communicate in a mature way.